- People don't understand the burden of the sin or struggle you are working through and they are (sometimes unintentionally) dismissive about it. They say things which make you feel worse or that don't help, which in turn, makes you not want to share.
- People don't believe you because they think you've got it all together. Of course you need to have it all together some time - how are you supposed to cope and function in life otherwise?!
- You fear the vulnerability of revealing your weakness.
- Your fear how crazy you will sound, especially to people who don't understand why your struggle is a struggle.
- You fear people will judge you when they see you working through the struggle (e.g. if you struggle with anger in a particular situation, you think they are watching you whenever you are in that situation).
- People are generally not good listeners and are too quick to jump to their own conclusions about what's wrong with you and what you need to do.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
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The women's seminar I ran on Holiness touched on some of these things. It's all about fear & pride.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your last point especially. I've spoken to MTSers in ministry who are like that & so I've been more reluctant to be totally honest with them. Obviously, it's not something I'm perfect at either, but I'm working on it & getting better. :)
There's a certain catch-22 around this: it's easier to share your struggles with someone who has first shared with you.
ReplyDeleteGood point, Dave. I think it all comes down to trust.
ReplyDeleteVery true what cafedave said. And I feel like ripped off if I have opened my heart out and the other person doesn't. like a lame loser with issues :)
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