Age numbers.

Everyone is always surprised at how old everybody else is. People don't seem old, but they have old ages. I think the reason is that an age sounds old, because it's a big number. 31. 45. 60.

One dessert a week rule

Jess loves rules and habits. I think habits are great, and rules are only good if they serve you in achieving goals (rather make you want to do the thing you're not supposed to).

I have a friend who lives at college and gets fed three meals a day plus snacks and dessert. He told me about his "one dessert a week" rule, to keep his diet healthy. I think this is great rule, especially for me. Even though I don't live at college, I do eat out a lot and I do like dessert. So this is a rule I'd be happy to implement. But often, there are treats and cakes at work, and some of those things are equivalent to dessert, so hmmoooooooo.

An alternative dessert rule is: all desserts must be shared, so that helps with spreading the richness of dessert.

Less than flattering

It's really tempting to only post the most flattering pictures of yourself online. Sometimes I see photos I'm tagged in and I think, "Ugh! I don't like it! I don't want it popping up on people's feeds." However, I've made a conscious decision that if I ever react like that, then I will allow the photo to be tagged because I think it's really important for me to comfortable with less than flattering pics of me being online.

For example, I don't like the pic in this post. It's petty things, such as my parted fringe, my strange colouring due to the filters and I think my face shape looks weird.

In spite of that, I'm still allowing pics like that to be posted because it's about accepting that I'm not perfect and I don't need to present a perfect image of me every time. Perfection is not my goal or ideal, and reminding myself of that is important. It's also a way of fighting against the "people will only like me if I'm pretty enough" stream of thought that pervades throughout society. This kind of thinking is broadly adopted by advertisers and marketers, "Buy this product and you will have amazing skin and a zillion friends!" or "This is what a beautiful/happy/successful person looks like and if you follow this diet/exercise routine/guru/attain an unrealistic body shape, your dreams will come true!" FALSE.

A lot of it too, is about self-acceptance and being okay with who you are. And learning that people who truly love you will love you regardless of how bad any camera angle may be. And learning to care less about stuff you really should care less about.

Also, I want to present a somewhat realistic image of me - my real friends know what I look like. I don't want to be too different or too unreal online.

Having said that, I still pick more flattering pics as profile pics :P That's one thing that won't change.

Adorkable

I would use adorkable to describe an adorable dork. I would put Hamish Blake in this category.

Individual taste.

I'm the only person I know who likes pumpernickel. It's a sliced brick of rye. It's not trendy, it's not pretty, it's not even delicious, and half the time it's not even in stock at Coles. But I'm dedicated. I don't inflict it on my friends and coworkers, other than the smell of it in the toaster.

Shared enjoyment is the best. The more obscure and particular the taste, the more the joy in finding kindred enjoyment.

Seasons change.

You know you've officially hit Autumn when the morning bus has the heating instead of the freezing air con.

I walked out the front door and had to go back and get my scarf. Also, I think I will be wearing socks tomorrow. This weekend will be the swapping of summer and winter clothes in the wardrobe and storage suitcase.

Breaking the silence.

A man overtook me walking to work, and I noticed his backpack was open. So I though I should tell him. But I did it awkwardly, it took many moments for me to pull my ipod out of my ears and form words with my brain and mouth. It's talking to a stranger, it's breaking that zone everyone locks themselves into with their morning commute, I felt weird and unnatural, plus it was probably the first words I'd spoken that day so my voice was still getting out of bed. "Your backpack is open" came out all slow, blurry and singsong, at an inappropriate volume—I sounded like a one of those talking dogs on youtube. He took like 5 seconds to understand me as well, before checking his backpack.

Tidying beyond convention.

In the free time at Engage, I spontaneously helped the friend of a friend tidy up her house for her in-laws to visit on Saturday afternoon. One of those crafty people who see potential in everything and have more inspiration than discipline in their life. I really couldn't sit there and do cross-stitch while she flapped around among the mess and babies saying "I'm just not motivated" so I offered to help her. She said "oh you don't have to" and I explained "I'm that kind of person" (the interfering helpfully sort). And I do believe that other people's mess is a bit easier to work with, because you are undistracted by the sentimental value of the mess, and can get more quickly to the satisfying 'before and after' transformation. Anyway, it was a weird and sort of taking-over thing to do in an almost strangers' house (it was the second time I was visiting), but on the other hand it was a practical and loving way to help, I think... it's hard to know where the boundaries are, sometimes.

Flake, Twirl, Twix

I like Cadbury's Flake Chocolate Bar, except that it's quite messy to eat. I recently rediscovered Twirl Bar, which is like a Flake encased in a chocolate shell. That makes it the perfect way to eat a Flake neatly. I also get Twirl and Twix mixed up because they both start with "twi", even though they're different chocolate bars and have different packaging.

Three years

I've noticed that a lot of my close friend are either 3+ years older than me or 3 years younger than me. What is it about the 3 year mark?

Tangent: on jelssie, we have the labels "ponderings" and "musings". I wonder what the difference is between the two?

Retailing in the internet age

A lot of the traditional bricks and mortars retailers in Australia have been finding it tough in the age of online shopping. They've been slow to jump on the online retailing bandwagon (e.g. Harvey Norman) and their profits have suffered as consumers search for better bargains online.

If you're happy to save money and wait a little bit longer to receive your product, why wouldn't you shop online? I was looking at a watch that retailed for $200 at David Jones and I found it on Amazon for around $60.

The truth is, retailers cannot compete on price alone. The internet will win nearly every time. You only need to look at the price of cosmetics in the major department store and compare them to their US prices.

One major way for bricks and mortars retailers to fight back is to offer something the internet can't: a particular kind of service. Benefit Cosmetics is a particularly good example of this (though the example might be somewhat flawed). Why pay inflated Aussie prices for Benefit Cosmetics when you can buy them cheaper online overseas? Instead, in opening a brow bar, they're providing a service for people that the internet cannot. They're also ensuring their income doesn't rest solely on their products alone. I'm pretty sure they do quite well with the brow bar.

Also, David Jones and Myer offer personal shopping. A few months ago, I came across it at DJs and asked about it. The personal shopper explained that it was a free service, you tell them what you're looking for, they find it for you on that floor, and you get to try the outfits they pick out for you in a really nice room (not your typical changeroom) with a glass of champers to boot. The smart thing is that DJs put this service on the floor where the clothes are more expensive than the floor below.

The globalisation of pop music

I caught a bit of PopAsia on SBS the other morning, and it got me thinking about the globalisation of pop music. I look at the clips and they don't seem that much different to Western pop music. My impression from watching the show is that there's a lot less solo artists and more groups.

As in Western pop, the Asian pop stars are also ridiculously thin and good-looking. The music sounds the same. It's hard to pinpoint what defines Asian pop, other than it's in an Asian language and the singers are Asian. There's lots of dancing and acting in the video clips, but that's the same for Western pop as well.

It's interesting to see how Asian beauty ideals differ from Western beauty ideals. The men are very lean, very pale and have very luminous skin. Western ideals dictate a more muscular build and a more tanned complexion.

Let me segue into this Bollywood song that's been stuck in my head ever since I saw Dhoom 2 (highly recommended) two weeks. It's a pop cultural masterpiece: the leads are ridiculously good-looking, the dancing is infectious and energetic, and the acting is dramatic and over-the-top. This song, Dhoom Again, is the lead track from Dhoom 2.  Love it.

Being new

Being new at church is hard, even for an extrovert like me, who loves meeting people. It's hard rocking up to a new church on your own and potentially not knowing anyone, especially if you thought church started at 9:30am, not 9:45am, and you sit there like a nigel while people are running after kids or running like headless chooks in order to get ready for church, and it's 20 minutes before someone talks to you. You start to feel strong pangs in your heart as you miss the people and the familiarity of your old church. I can see how people might lapse from being part of a church family if they had to change churches.

Forming new relationships is a two way street. The people there have to be willing to welcome you and talk to you, but you have to be willing to get involved, introduce yourself and make an effort. If you can put up with the initial discomfort of being new, get involved and just hang in there, your new church family will soon be familiar and start to feel like family. That's my strategy anyway.

No tv

My tv viewing habits have been highly influenced by the people I've lived with. I've never owned a tv, but there's always been one in whatever household I've lived in. I've watched tv shows with housemates and gotten into Masterchef, Biggest Loser, Dr Who etc etc, but now, in my current household, my housemate doesn't have a tv and I don't think I should buy one because my spare time will soon be filled with study.

I do miss it a little. There are some shows I would like to watch e.g. The Voice (but only because everyone talks about it), Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries and Community.

TV can be a great tool for unwinding and entertaining as well, but I've found not having one is a good excuse to invite myself over to people's places to watch it :) I haven't actually done that yet, but I am slowly compiling a list of people who've agreed to have me over for tv, which might be a nice way to hang out with introverted friends.

My dad offered to buy me a tv and I asked for a smartphone instead. He said, "No, tv only." So you see, if I had a choice, I'd receive a smartphone over a tv, but if I had to pay for a tv out of my own pocket, I'd get a tv over a smartphone because I would buy a cheap tv!

However, if I start reacting like this after a while, I may get a tv:

Discrete couples

Sometimes, some couples are so discrete that when they announce their engagement, you go, "Woah, I didn't even know they were dating!" and occasionally, "Woah, I didn't even know they knew each other!"