Rules make life easier. If I have rules, I don't have to spend as much brainpower evaluating every situation. Cos decisions are hard. Having a rule for a situation doesn't mean that I can never vary my behaviour, but I have a default I stick to.
So I have a rule that I never buy lunch at work. I sometimes buy lunch, when I eat with my colleagues, or there is something new to try, but it's pretty rare. My default is to bring lunch.
And I have a "bedtime". And when it's about that time I go to bed. I don't go to bed when I've finished watching TV, or when I feel tired, or any other arbitrary thing, a different time each night and a specific decision each night. My default is, bedtime. No discipline or thought required.
So that's how I see rules. I'm free to do what I want, eat what I want, go to bed what I want, but all that choice is exhausting. A good habit is a huge relief. And rules help me prop my behaviour until good habits are set.
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I admire this. Can you mentor me? By the way what time is 'bed time'?
ReplyDeleteI admire this. Can you mentor me? By the way what time is 'bed time'?
ReplyDeleteI AM HAPPY TO SHARE!!!!!!
DeleteFor me, bedtime is 10pm. Cos that's how I get 8 hours sleep. Earlier if I'm tired, like last night was maybe 9pm, I had a 4.45am morning though. Later if I'm out, I don't rush home to go to bed. But if I'm home, on a regular normal night, 10pm.
I recently discovered a guy who has labelled everything I do and made it sound like a real thing. http://everydaysystems.com/
I find it relatively easy to follow rules when I want to reinforce good habits, but it's a lot harder to follow rules when I'm trying to change a bad habit. I find a rule for never buying lunch easy, because I've never been into buying lunch. But a rule for no snacking after dinner is EXCRUCIATINGLY HARD. I kind of have to break it down to little tiny rules to minimise the damage, like not buying blocks of chocolate.
Calling it a "challenge" and giving it a catchy name really helps though. I probably just need a cool name for stopping night snacking. Something to do with wizards or Miss Marple or something.
Thanks for this wisdom. The snacking after dinner thing is a biggun for sure. It's definitely a bingey time for me. Maybe a good thing to do is, after I've drunk my tea, head straight for the bathroom and brush my teeth. That way I'm less likely to hook into those three rows of cadbury.
ReplyDeletethe beddtime's a hard one for me. I get up pretty early, but never really allow for more than 6 hours, which I can cope on, but am not at the peak of my powers come morning time (which is a very low peak at the best of times- more of a hillock). But night time me is so careless and rebellious and sneers at responsible morning me. He's very selfish, and can find all manner of hobbies to begin at 11:30pm. Cruel night time me.
Thanks for this wisdom. The snacking after dinner thing is a biggun for sure. It's definitely a bingey time for me. Maybe a good thing to do is, after I've drunk my tea, head straight for the bathroom and brush my teeth. That way I'm less likely to hook into those three rows of cadbury.
ReplyDeletethe beddtime's a hard one for me. I get up pretty early, but never really allow for more than 6 hours, which I can cope on, but am not at the peak of my powers come morning time (which is a very low peak at the best of times- more of a hillock). But night time me is so careless and rebellious and sneers at responsible morning me. He's very selfish, and can find all manner of hobbies to begin at 11:30pm. Cruel night time me.