How I'll be single.

I had a revelation today. I'm single, and yes that is a bummer cos if I had the choice I would want to be married, but:

I'm going to be single in such a way that people don't feel sorry for me, and I don't feel sorry for myself. I'm going to be self-reliant, loved by a lot of people, live life to the fullest and make the most of every opportunity. I'm going to try and not moan about the disadvantages, not blame all my problems on being single, not be jealous of people who are getting married (esp young cute people), and generally avoid thinking and speaking negatively. I want people to look at me and see someone living a valid and fulfilled life. I've lived almost 30 years as a single, and I'm used to it, and it's fine.

Some catalysts:

• Bec's blog on Crazy Cat Ladies that made me angry at the disdain our culture has for single people.
• Single people I know who really hate being single. I want to love being single, and I want others to love it.
• One line from the speaker at Engage this year: "marriage isn't singleness plus some better married stuff, you lose singleness when you get married", I forget the exact words but it was about not idealising marriage.

I just wanted to sort of declare it somewhere. Neither marriage nor singleness is without difficulties, but neither is without blessings either, and I'm going to focus on really thriving in singleness and blasting away that corrosive pity, or whatever it is, with the rest of my awesome single life, God-willing.